Sunday, June 23, 2013
Friday, June 21, 2013
If You Think It - It Will Come!
"It's the most fabulous daaaay of the week!"
Did you sing the song in your head? Did ya?
Okay - Friday is here it's time to tune in to our FABULOUSNESS!!! (I'm going to put that word out into the Universe so many times that Webster's dictionary is going to decide it IS a word after all!)
So this week our Fabulous Friday body image challenge is all about the mind. Visualization. I believe it is a very powerful tool. Basically, what you're doing with visualization techniques is training your mind to see the potential in your future. If you believe in the law of attraction you're also helping the Universe to see that potential and help you to bring it about.
I won't go into a big explanation of the law of attraction, though. We'll concentrate instead on what visualization can do for you, psychologically. Any therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist will tell you that visualization is an incredibly effective tool in helping to heal and in helping to see a better future ahead.
So here's what I need you to do...close your eyes.
...
Um...
Wait, that's not a good idea.
Okay, I'll go first.
...
Um...it's harder to type like this.
K, never mind I'll explain the process and we'll all just have to try it AFTER. :)
So, find a comfortable position. (Not so comfy you'll fall asleep though!) Close your eyes. And for the first minute or two just let your mind relax, let the random thoughts flow through them. Including the thoughts - "this is dumb." and "this won't work." Those are all valid thoughts...think them, and then throw them away and keep trying.
Once you've given yourself a minute or two to settle in, begin trying to visualize. All visualization is, is imagining. I know that some of us are going to find imagining an easier task than others. As grown ups we're taught that our imaginations are silly and impractical.
This is not true.
Our imaginations are powerful, and a wonderful tool for bringing about change. For those that struggle with bringing pictures into your mind. Try words at first. Try printing out the words in your mind, like a book.
What we should be trying to visualize or imagine is a feeling. We should be trying to imagine what it will feel like when we are at home in our bodies.
I'd like to take a minute to explain, that I don't want us to all imagine that we look like runway models. (Because trust me, a great majority of those beautiful women are NOT at home in their bodies.)
What we should be visualizing is the FEELING of contentment and peace that will come when we have let go of the hate toward our bodies; when we've let go of the frustration and the need to hide away. We should be visualizing a feeling of freedom. (It may take a couple of visualization sessions just to get to a point where you can imagine that feeling.)
In your imagination, you can see yourself at any size you choose. You can look exactly as you do now, you can look like you've gone down a few pounds or you can look like you've got down to your healthy goal weight. Whatever you choose, the "you" in your mind should be smiling. "You" should feel contended and at ease.
How does that contentment affect "you"? Does it make "you" move in a different way? In your mind's eye, watch yourself move around in this new way. See the confidence in your movement, see the pride and lack of apology in your actions.
How does this feeling of happiness with your body change the way "you" interact with the people around "you"? Imagine interactions with your partner, your children, your co-workers, strangers. Take the time to really see those situations and take note of how this new sense of self affects those relationships. Does it change them? Does it not?
Finally, how does this change in attitude change how "you" feel about "yourself". Does it make you love yourself more? Does it make you less critical? Walk through an imaginary day, doing the things you might normally do, all the while holding on to this imaginary peace of mind about your body. Does the feeling give you more energy? Do you feel you can accomplish more in this new frame of mind?
As you're finishing the visualization, try to take careful note of what YOU (in the here and now) are feeling. Try to hold on to those feelings of contentment and acceptance.
The goal of course is to bring those feelings and that mindset out of our imaginations and into reality. If you imagine something enough times, it begins to seep into your reality.
Phew - I don't know about you, but I have a feeling my brain is going to hurt after doing this exercise.
But I think it is definitely going to be worth it if we can use our imaginations to help us realize our full potential for fabulous!!!
Happy Friday!!!
Thursday, June 20, 2013
Wednesday, June 19, 2013
But What Have You Done Lately?
I've been writing the blog for just over a month now. My first post was on May 16th. This will be post number 37.
And it got me thinking.
What have I accomplished so far?
Tomorrow I have to take photo #2 in my "progression" pictures. It's going to look VERY much like photo #1. I have NOT lost any weight. In fact, owing to my flattering, but malfunctioning bathroom scale, I am actually 7 pounds heavier than I thought I was when I started.
I have been eating terribly over the last two weeks. I have not been counting points because the food I have on hand is the stretch and scrimp kind, and it is not conducive to careful monitoring. I've been trying to eat only till I'm comfortably full and not stuff myself. But I've been doing nothing to "lose" weight; only maintain it at this point.
These things could be discouraging. There was a time when I definitely would have thrown in the towel and declared defeat.
But. Not this time. This time I'm fighting on.
You see, over these 37 posts I've been discovering myself. My history. My reasons. My beliefs. And actually I've been discovering my body.
And amazingly, I've been coming to dislike it less. I can't say I love it yet. And there are definitely times where I'm mad at it. I have a ways to go to get to loving it. But I'm done hating it. I'm done punishing it. I'm trying to listen to it more. Learn it's signals, learn its rhythms.
I've spent SO many years (almost my whole life!) not just ignoring my body but doing everything in my power to pretend it wasn't there. If I had my way I would just be a floating head.
But I have this beautiful, kind of miraculous, body. And its been here all the time and I could have, SHOULD HAVE, been enjoying it all along.
But I'm determined not to dwell on could haves and should haves. I only have the here and now; and here and now, I still have the use of my limbs, even if moving can be painful at least it's still possible.
So this month has not been a total loss. One thing I've always suspected but have proven to myself most DEFINITELY over the last month, is that you have to manage to love the body you currently live in. If you can't do this, you will never be satisfied and confident. You will always feel less than, and never be content with the image in the mirror.
This is what I've been working on this month.
The end of this month should mean slightly better cash flow, hence slightly better/healthier food. So, I'll start again trying to track and reduce my caloric intake. And we'll see what happens over the up-coming month.
But with all I've learned from this introspection and all the wonderful conversations I've had with you guys, I'm counting this month a success.
Today I'm going out sleeveless. That is a huge success. And kind of a miracle. :)
Tuesday, June 18, 2013
Shame on Fat Shaming!!!
There's this thing called "Fat Shaming".
Seriously, that's an actual thing. It's a "health" movement with the sole purpose of shaming fat people into becoming thin.
What the hell is the matter with this world?
NEVER in a million years would I ever THINK of shaming someone who was extremely underweight or anorexic into gaining weight. So why on EARTH do people think it's okay to shame people into losing weight.
And this isn't just a movement set forth by a bunch of jackasses who have nothing better to do with their time than make fun of fat people. This idea has been taken up by everyone from biochemists to health experts to the City of Atlanta.
These are the pictures the City of Atlanta posted on billboards all over their city:
I find it ironic that the last one talks about how "it might be funny to you, but it's killing me." after THEY made fun of the other little kids. The pun on "little girl" in the first picture; the "buffet line" zinger in the second - all SO hilarious!!
Another billboard they displayed features a chubby little boy with the clever caption; "Big Bones Didn't Make Me This Way, Big Meals Did."
Hardy, Har Har!! I get it! It has nothing to do with the kid's body type - the fact that he was born an Endomorph has NOTHING to do with the fact that he's a big kid. It's just cause he a "fatty, fatty 2 by 4" who won't stop eating!
Or maybe, just maybe it's something else. If the city of Atlanta is so concerned with the fact that a great number of their children are fighting obesity then maybe they should take a look at the fact that they have one of the highest poverty rates in the United States. Maybe tackle that problem before you go around making fun of little kids and trying to shame them into losing weight.
I CAN NOT understand why anyone with half a brain would get behind this idea.
The world at large already shames fat people for being fat on a daily basis.
Seriously, that's an actual thing. It's a "health" movement with the sole purpose of shaming fat people into becoming thin.
What the hell is the matter with this world?
NEVER in a million years would I ever THINK of shaming someone who was extremely underweight or anorexic into gaining weight. So why on EARTH do people think it's okay to shame people into losing weight.
And this isn't just a movement set forth by a bunch of jackasses who have nothing better to do with their time than make fun of fat people. This idea has been taken up by everyone from biochemists to health experts to the City of Atlanta.
These are the pictures the City of Atlanta posted on billboards all over their city:
I find it ironic that the last one talks about how "it might be funny to you, but it's killing me." after THEY made fun of the other little kids. The pun on "little girl" in the first picture; the "buffet line" zinger in the second - all SO hilarious!!
Another billboard they displayed features a chubby little boy with the clever caption; "Big Bones Didn't Make Me This Way, Big Meals Did."
Hardy, Har Har!! I get it! It has nothing to do with the kid's body type - the fact that he was born an Endomorph has NOTHING to do with the fact that he's a big kid. It's just cause he a "fatty, fatty 2 by 4" who won't stop eating!
Or maybe, just maybe it's something else. If the city of Atlanta is so concerned with the fact that a great number of their children are fighting obesity then maybe they should take a look at the fact that they have one of the highest poverty rates in the United States. Maybe tackle that problem before you go around making fun of little kids and trying to shame them into losing weight.
I CAN NOT understand why anyone with half a brain would get behind this idea.
The world at large already shames fat people for being fat on a daily basis.
Look how funny, Peta is!
Ha! It's funny, cause look how freaked out he is by the idea of dating or liking a "fat girl!"
Fat people have to deal with these jokes and judgments everyday. On top of the judgments and cruelties we throw at ourselves. Does the world really think making people feel worse about themselves is going to help them?
Really?
First of all health comes in all shapes and sizes. Slim people can be healthy, but being slim doesn't necessarily make them so.
Fat people can be unhealthy, but being fat doesn't necessarily make them so.
Secondly, only love can make a difference. This is true in pretty much anything we talk about. At the end of the day, only learning to love our bodies and doing our best to be healthy WITHOUT hurting ourselves, will yield the results we're hoping for.
In other words, do this:
Not this:
Love yourselves today and tell the haters:
Monday, June 17, 2013
A Thorny Crown
The Miss USA pageant was on last night and it got me to thinking.
When I was little I used to watch the pageants (Miss America and Miss USA) with my mom every year. It was always fun to pick our favourites and groan a little for the ones that just could NOT get out a straight answer to the interview questions to save their lives. Or, in this case, their crowns.
After the newest queen had been crowned, I would always go and stand in front of our bathroom mirror and wait in imagined anticipation of being crowned Miss America. Even though I was Canadian. Hey, what did I know about geographical jurisdiction when I was seven?
Inevitably the announcer in my head would call the name of the runner up, leaving me standing there shocked and crying to have been named Miss America. I would take whatever headband was closest and place it tremblingly on my head, always holding it on precariously as I made my triumphant walk to the strains of "There she is...Miss America!!!" floating through my head.
I would generally lay a shampoo bottle across my forearm to act as my flowers. (This was usually the same shampoo bottle that would act as my fake Oscar later when I gave my fake acceptance speech at the fake Academy Awards.) I would blow kisses and wave at the cheering crowd.
I was a little girl, pretending to have grown up into what every little girl (or most, anyway) dream of growing into - a modern day princess complete with a crown.
And looking back it was kind of sweet. Except. I was being taught, without my knowledge of it, that beauty gets rewarded and striving to be the most beautiful one out of the pack is the way to go.
Let me say, right off the bat, that there is (obviously!) nothing wrong with being beautiful. If you've been born with a gift of beauty count yourself a lucky person; and then, forget about it and concentrate on cultivating your mind and character.
Shouldn't that be what we're all striving for?
But, unfortunately, as much as the producers of these pageants might claim that they're about "scholarships" and "inner beauty", that's really a big fat lie. Because when was the last time a contestant won both Miss Congeniality and the title of Miss America? And they still parade the women around in bathing suits and bikinis, like pieces of meat on display. How, exactly, does that show off their inner beauty and what does looking good in a bikini have to do with being worthy of a scholarship?
The producers will claim that the swimsuit portion of the pageant is to show off the women's health and fitness. Except. The majority of these women are NOT healthy.
For example, do you remember a while back there was a woman named Alicia Machado. She was Miss Venezuela and then went on to win Miss Universe.
She looked like this when she won the pageant:
You can see a little in the second picture how prominent her collar bone is. Unfortunately we're so used to seeing women like this in the media, we just accept it as the norm. However, when she won Miss Universe Miss Machado was 5'9 and 118 pounds. According to most doctors and fitness charts, the "ideal weight" or healthy range for a woman who is 5'9 and has a medium frame, is between 139 and 153.
So, when Miss Machado won she was at least 21 pounds underweight, if not more. As she traveled around as Miss Universe, she began to put on some weight. They never said how much weight she gained, (because it was so scandalous and terrible!) but this is what she looked like AFTER she gained the weight that almost got her stripped of her crown.
(It's pretty tough to find pictures of her after the weight gain because they made her stop doing most public appearances. This was from a banquet in Thailand.)
Healthy and beautiful.
But this gorgeous body almost forced her to forfeit her win as a "Beauty Queen".
Which is why beauty pageants are SO dangerous. We are teaching the young girls who are watching them (you REALLY don't want to get me started on the poor little girls that are COMPETING in these things!) that not only is BEAUTY the most important thing to strive for, but they should be striving for this ridiculously unhealthy, and mostly unattainable (certainly unsustainable) idea of beauty.
So, for my part (even though there is still a part of me that remembers my plastic, headband tiaras with fondness) I am going to keep my daughter from viewing these pageants for as long as possible.
Maybe we'll watch the Scripps Spelling Bee competition instead. And maybe she can stand in front of the bathroom mirror and cheer with joy after pretending to spell a particularly hard word.
Or...she could do the pretend Oscar acceptance speech too. I'd be fine with that.
When I was little I used to watch the pageants (Miss America and Miss USA) with my mom every year. It was always fun to pick our favourites and groan a little for the ones that just could NOT get out a straight answer to the interview questions to save their lives. Or, in this case, their crowns.
After the newest queen had been crowned, I would always go and stand in front of our bathroom mirror and wait in imagined anticipation of being crowned Miss America. Even though I was Canadian. Hey, what did I know about geographical jurisdiction when I was seven?
Inevitably the announcer in my head would call the name of the runner up, leaving me standing there shocked and crying to have been named Miss America. I would take whatever headband was closest and place it tremblingly on my head, always holding it on precariously as I made my triumphant walk to the strains of "There she is...Miss America!!!" floating through my head.
I would generally lay a shampoo bottle across my forearm to act as my flowers. (This was usually the same shampoo bottle that would act as my fake Oscar later when I gave my fake acceptance speech at the fake Academy Awards.) I would blow kisses and wave at the cheering crowd.
I was a little girl, pretending to have grown up into what every little girl (or most, anyway) dream of growing into - a modern day princess complete with a crown.
And looking back it was kind of sweet. Except. I was being taught, without my knowledge of it, that beauty gets rewarded and striving to be the most beautiful one out of the pack is the way to go.
Let me say, right off the bat, that there is (obviously!) nothing wrong with being beautiful. If you've been born with a gift of beauty count yourself a lucky person; and then, forget about it and concentrate on cultivating your mind and character.
Shouldn't that be what we're all striving for?
But, unfortunately, as much as the producers of these pageants might claim that they're about "scholarships" and "inner beauty", that's really a big fat lie. Because when was the last time a contestant won both Miss Congeniality and the title of Miss America? And they still parade the women around in bathing suits and bikinis, like pieces of meat on display. How, exactly, does that show off their inner beauty and what does looking good in a bikini have to do with being worthy of a scholarship?
The producers will claim that the swimsuit portion of the pageant is to show off the women's health and fitness. Except. The majority of these women are NOT healthy.
For example, do you remember a while back there was a woman named Alicia Machado. She was Miss Venezuela and then went on to win Miss Universe.
She looked like this when she won the pageant:
You can see a little in the second picture how prominent her collar bone is. Unfortunately we're so used to seeing women like this in the media, we just accept it as the norm. However, when she won Miss Universe Miss Machado was 5'9 and 118 pounds. According to most doctors and fitness charts, the "ideal weight" or healthy range for a woman who is 5'9 and has a medium frame, is between 139 and 153.
So, when Miss Machado won she was at least 21 pounds underweight, if not more. As she traveled around as Miss Universe, she began to put on some weight. They never said how much weight she gained, (because it was so scandalous and terrible!) but this is what she looked like AFTER she gained the weight that almost got her stripped of her crown.
(It's pretty tough to find pictures of her after the weight gain because they made her stop doing most public appearances. This was from a banquet in Thailand.)
Healthy and beautiful.
But this gorgeous body almost forced her to forfeit her win as a "Beauty Queen".
Which is why beauty pageants are SO dangerous. We are teaching the young girls who are watching them (you REALLY don't want to get me started on the poor little girls that are COMPETING in these things!) that not only is BEAUTY the most important thing to strive for, but they should be striving for this ridiculously unhealthy, and mostly unattainable (certainly unsustainable) idea of beauty.
So, for my part (even though there is still a part of me that remembers my plastic, headband tiaras with fondness) I am going to keep my daughter from viewing these pageants for as long as possible.
Maybe we'll watch the Scripps Spelling Bee competition instead. And maybe she can stand in front of the bathroom mirror and cheer with joy after pretending to spell a particularly hard word.
Or...she could do the pretend Oscar acceptance speech too. I'd be fine with that.
Sunday, June 16, 2013
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